Provided you couldn’t give a rat’s arse about quality, eating for bugger all money has never been better. You can buy a 10 inch pizza on Dame street for a fiver.
Most of the units in The Epicurean Food Hall on Liffey Street are “all you can eat buffets” now. But cheapest of all, are the Spars and Centras – lashing out mad combo deals to try and flog more sambos. Like a sarnie with a packet of crisps and a bottle of water for €2.50 or a baguette for €2.
But believe me you, if they can afford to sell sandwiches for under two quid and give away all sorts of shite with them, then you know they must be using cat food to fill their bread. Sadly, these uber thrifty bits of shite are bringing down the good name of the sandwich.
There is no reason why any of us should be eating this garbage. If you don’t want to pay more than a couple of euro for a sarnie, just make your own for fuck’s sake. The ham and prosciutto from Lidl costs fuck all, lash that it in with some salad and swiss cheese in a baguette. Grand job.
Of course, on the other end of the end of the scale there are some sandwiches that are actually fantastic and go way beyond filling the hole at lunchtime. Anyone who has spent some serious time in San Fran will know where I’m going next. If you ever want to taste the finest sandwich in the world, head to the city by the bay, get yer arse over to Kingfoot Subs on Divisadero and buy their Beef Teriyaki. Words can not do this work of art any justice. Good friends of mine used to live off these fucking things and literally, NOTHING else (that was edible anyway). Usually by about 5pm the beef teriyaki would all be gone.
For any of you who don’t fancy traveling thousands of miles just to eat a Beefer, here’s how you can make….
THE SECOND BEST SANDWICH IN THE WORLD, EVER
SALSICCIA WITH FRIED PEPPERS AND ONIONS IN A CIABATTA
Salsiccia is the Italian word for sausages, but when you get Salsiccia outside of Italy they tend to be the slightly coarser and have a harder texture than most other varieties. They are not cured like chorizo, so you have to cook them through. You can buy them in Magill’s on Clarendon Street or Listons on Camden Street and occasionally Hicks make their own.
Half a green or red pepper, sliced in strips
Half a red onion, sliced in strips
Some olive oil
A tiny sprinkle of finely chopped rosemary and black pepper
Put a drop of olive oil onto a pan with some medium heat under it.
Fry the sausage. When one side is done and the juice has started coming out of it, lash in the pepper and onion.
Meanwhile, heat up your ciabatta in the oven or slightly toast just the outside of it.
When everything is cooked, slice the ciabatta and put some mayo on one side of it.
Slice the sausage in half, drop the two halves in evenly with the pepper and onion around it. Sprinkle a little rosemary and pepper to taste.
A can of that posh lemonade shit.